Choices

This is a regular theme for my mental contemplation. Whenever I have spare thinking time I tend to mull over the choices I have made, and the ones before me. For example, I am no longer analysing my marriage, since that is over and the choice is made, but I spent alot of time considering my choices before my hand was forced (I could have kept considering and being miserable for an indefinite period of time, since underneath my strong exterior I am ultimately a coward about making big decisions).

Today I made the choice to walk instead of catching a bus (ended up walking for 2 hrs, yay me), even though it was looking like rain, and at one stage did rain, but then I made the choice to keep walking anyway and enjoy being wet.

During my long walk I thought about living in the same house as X (ex-DH is just too much time to spend on writing his pseudonym). I was imagining what I would say if someone asked me how I can do it without wanting to rip his eyes out.

ummm, well, for starters I don't go around ripping people's eyes out when they p*** me off. And, well, he isn't that bad a bloke. I don't like him, he isn't the right bloke for me by a long shot, but he isn't a bad bloke. He doesn't hit girls, he is responsible with money...hang on, I take that back and will write more shortly... he can cook, he can do some housework, umm...ok. I say 'can' regarding the house stuff because he sees it as optional and chooses not to do it, or to do as little as possible. But he is kind of boring and not really interested in life outside of his teeny little box.

Speaking of boxes and money...he bought an enormous LCD tv. With a surround sound system that stands on poles around the room. The tv doesn't surprise me, since that is his number one passion, but speakers on poles? Idiot! Helloooo, we have a TODDLER! I said as much to him. I made some comment about him thinking like a single man, he thought I was having a go at him about spending so much, but I don't care, it is his money and he earnt it, but speakers on poles is just plain dumb, and I said that.

Idiot. He laughed it off and I just said that I was glad it wasn't my problem. Sucked in to him when Toddler breaks them because X isn't keeping an eye on him. Idiot.

Had a look at an apartment today. It is in a great spot and I have every part of my body that I possibly can crossed in hope. It is above my budget, but so is everything else around here, and I am keen to move. The agent was friendly and I made it clear that I could move in immediately and that I had the money for all the costs available.

Had my second weigh-in yesterday and I have lost 2.3kgs. (watch me dance, baby!!!!!!) I am pleased and am aiming to keep those scales going down. I went out and bought the Wii Fit today on my walking trip (and carried it home, it is heavier than you think, lol), I will go and set it up shortly and have a play. I am looking forward to my dance classes starting in two weeks. Oh, I finally heard back from the cricket team, too late ladies, my dance classes are on the same time, so there goes that idea for this season.

I am surprised by what a difference a couple of kilos can make in how I feel physically, but it is probably the good food I am eating too, instead of all the crap. I don't feel like I have more energy, because I am not sleeping too great, but my stamina is better and slopes and stairs aren't so breath-taking in the literal sense, lol.

Have a great long weekend and if you are in NSW don't forget to put your clock forward one hour tomorrow morning.