It is a Vivaldi sort of day

When I am not so great I like to listen to Vivaldi.

My head feels messy tonight, for various reasons...

I find myself missing D, yet I cannot figure out why I am missing him as I have had so little to do with him for so long. I do not want to miss him, he does not deserve that attention.

I was irritated this morning, D2 stayed over and followed me around a bit while I was getting myself and the kids ready for work. He has asked me a couple of times about my morning routine and when he asked me again this morning I was a little snappy because I felt like he was trying to know every move I make. I do not want to have to justify how I organise my mornings, or timetable what I do in the morning, for anyone.

Work was not so great, we were given a new task that was boring, but necessary. I got feedback for stupid mistakes that were based on lack of knowledge that could have been passed on by our trainers, so that annoyed me too. Was glad to find out I was not the only one making the mistake, but it has created more work for me tomorrow morning. I have fairly high expectations for myself and I guess I need to relax a little about that.

I feel like I want to eat choc and drink wine, then go hide in my room for the rest of the evening. Of course that is not really an option. I have choc, so will indulge, then will complete my housework and mummy stuff and relax with a movie or book.

I am reading New Moon again by Stephenie Meyer. The movie comes out soon and I wanted to refresh my memory of the book. It is actually kind of hard to read because when Bella talks about the intensity of her feelings for Edward I am reminded of how I felt for D. It is a challenge.

I am enjoying spending time with D2. It appears that he feels about me the way I felt about D last October/November. D2 is already using the 'L' word and talking about missing me when he does not see me. I cannot even begin to claim to feel the same way, so I refrain from such declarations. I quite happily say that I like him alot and enjoy his company, but I am not in any sort of rush to jump into a full on relationship. He would like to spend every night with me, but no way is that happening any time soon, and this morning is a good example of why I should not rush it. He has met my mum, and he will meet my best friend on Sunday. I would have been quite happy to not see him till Sunday, but I have said he can visit on Thurs. I like the cuddles, lol, and as I have already said, I do like his company.

D2 has to sell his house in the next couple of months to pay out his ex and I can see him possibly pushing to move in when that happens. Well, no, he will not be moving in, certainly not this year and not so soon after meeting him. We have talked about a trip to Fiji in Dec/Jan, this is something I would love to do and so I will see how we are at that stage. Maybe when we come back from that I will know whether I want to live with him.